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Post by Rob on May 10, 2004 3:54:39 GMT
About a marraige, well what my friends say about it. i was at a wedding this saturday, and somehow i managed to wake up cynical, maybe its cos i cant commit. any how, i guess it serves me right cos this one was so painful. i nearly scrapped it twice. it just never turned out how i wanted it. it was supposed to be an acoustic version, but im keeping that one underwraps! after putting 3..or...4 vocals ...can't remember, there was quite a few at one point, i finally gave up. i think theres a song in there somewhere, but im not sure i can find it!! i jazzed up the chorus...and maybe i should do the same to the verse...or should i take this one off the life support machine? hopefully it will sound better tomorrow morning.
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Post by latmat on May 10, 2004 4:08:16 GMT
Rob to be honest,
I think an acoustic version or just an acoustic in the mix would serve this tune way way better, Its has some great lyrics but needs some tender lovin care! I'd really love to hear some nice acoustic with thicker chord voicings. Lots of passion man, keep workin on it man. It has a lots of emotion, great lyrics and a cool melody all the workings of a wonderful song, dont give up on it!
Cameron
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Post by Rob on May 10, 2004 4:12:03 GMT
theres someting in there i know it. glad you can see it. but this one has failed the cringe test today! i will try not to give up on it though.
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Post by mcarp555 on May 10, 2004 12:09:36 GMT
Firstly, let's include the link so it's easier to go listen: THE LINK. Now, There's a good solid song in there - the structure is good, the pacing, etc. I also thought the drums fit very well. Are they PS5 drums? If so, good job programming them. The guitar reminds me a lot of the Red Hot Chili Peppers, but I can't remember the name of the song! One of their big hits (it's been awhile since I've listened to a radio). Needless to say, the guitar part was impressive. Didn't need any flash to make the points. I think all this song might really need is a bit more 'oomph' starting at the first chorus. Is there a bass part? I don't recall hearing one. That might help, and as Cam suggested, maybe some acoustic strumming away in the background. I like the verses kinda sparse, tho. Overall it's certainly worth having a think about what can be done. You're 85% there and it's too good to throw away.
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Post by JimDurand on May 10, 2004 14:24:40 GMT
Rob,
I like it. Great lyrics. You're becoming a true song writer - each day's life events is inspiration for another song!
Jim
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Post by mattl on May 10, 2004 14:28:51 GMT
rob your best yet.. i thionk it helps workin on something you care about. (or hate hahahhahaha)
lets put it this way: the end was way way better than i thought it could get, so that meaning my impression with the beggining was similiar to mikes.. needs some more oomph, perhaps careful. not sure what it is.. but maybe if theres less instrumentation maybe some very carefully retaken vocals or something..
mike: red hot chili pepper: "under the bridge" about getting sober or somerthing i think.. one of the few songs by them i really liked.
rob let me rephrase.. most of this song is awesome!! what ION the world have you done.. switched vitamin brands opr something???
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Post by mattl on May 10, 2004 14:31:49 GMT
i can see what cam is saying but...
just for the record my vote is keep guitar as is i love it.. youre pissed and hurting.. electric!! just my vote.
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Post by Havin' Fun on May 10, 2004 17:18:32 GMT
I've enjoyed hearing all you young buck's lately - latmat, mattl, and, now, rob. Well done, matey.
Of course there will always be things that you'll want to change in a song, but like Mike suggested, solid construction.
PS5 vocal effects rarely jazz me, so that' s my only "negative" on this song.
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Post by Rob on May 10, 2004 20:30:19 GMT
hey, thanks, youve all inspried me. youre right i was really pissed with it! but you have got me all excited about it again!
mike, you know what, it doesnt have bass in it. and i think that youre right, maybe thats what it needs. would you be interested in supplying a bass track?
i'm glad you like the guitar. to be honest i cant do the lead stuff, and i dont even know which chords im playing here, all i know is that the E shape is used for every chord!!
yeah the drums are PS5 (ballard organ style).
hey jimd, thanks mate, glad you liked it.
mattl, yeah your right , i have to redo those vocals. im glad about the response on the guitar. electric ...YEAH BABY! (sorry cam!!)
actually theres not much effect on the voice (de-casser?!), but i did the delay on it and then added a touch of reverb, and then went bananas on the additonal vocals. i agree though its bloody mess now!! and may as well have been done using the ps5 vocal effects, (which i agree are poop). i will redo the vocals.
hey guys, thanks for listening, i shall have another crack at the vocals.
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Post by mcarp555 on May 10, 2004 20:50:41 GMT
Ooh, I like knowing what chords I'm supposed to be backing up. . . I'll have another listen and see if I could do anything that wouldn't sound like poop.
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Post by Rob on May 10, 2004 20:54:00 GMT
i bought a wall chart for this very reason! so i shall find out what they are and let you know.
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Post by Havin' Fun on May 10, 2004 21:06:03 GMT
If you downloaded the FREE software that I posted a link for under "Gadgets & Gizmos", you wouldn't need a bleeding wall chart.
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Post by mattl on May 10, 2004 21:27:27 GMT
if you have the track space id be happy to attempt some lead on it too!! feedback.. angels singing.. demons screaming kinda thing i didnt really listen to it with that in mind so it may not work out if not no biggy.. works great without a solo.. im listenin now.. its the first 22 secs.. a little off. theres a bunch of G A D in there..
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Post by latmat on May 10, 2004 23:13:45 GMT
Hey rob
Its your song, but I think an acoustic is a great way of filling in gaps in sound and tone, By all means the electric guitar should be there regaurdless but an acoustic might give that fuller sound even some more feeling. You know the acoustic doesnt need to be heard so much as felt its more of a wall of tone, like an organ. Most songs have an acoustic in the mix somewhere under all the other stuff. plus its keeps time trudgin along.
Anywho good luck with it, Cameron
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Post by Rob on May 11, 2004 12:55:59 GMT
cam, actually i guess i knew that about the "filling out" issue, but to be honest i needed someone to spell it out! i think i shall revist the acoustic version and do exactly what your saying here.
mike, i tried to work out the chords and got D and A but couldnt get the rest?!! this is so embarrassing. i found all the notes i wanted on the guitar for the bass...as it stands now i have put a bass line in, but played it on the guitar and only played the bass line inbetween the overdriven chorus. in this way two people can play (guitars) as it is, on stage (with only the drum machine).
(i really have to learn some music theory stuff)
matt, i think i can do some bouncing. if you are interested i can certainly bounce the vocals...
thanks for all the support, this song could well have been left behind if it wasnt for you lot, we both thank you very much!
oh fyi, i took the reverb off too (only had value of 2 but made a difference...i think)
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